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Putting It All Into Perspective

All too often we as race fans (myself included) get caught up in the little idiosyncrasies of the sport. Did Dale Jr. qualify on the pole? How big is Ron Capps’ point lead in Funny Car? We all love racing but we sometimes follow it like it is life or death. Joyously and sadly I experienced both of those in less than a week.

If you are reading this and are looking for insight on who might have the edge heading into the next NHRA drag race you might be disappointed. I am feeling a bit like Tom Cruise’s character in Jerry Maguire when he stayed up all night and wrote his ‘Mission Statement’. This might be inane ramblings or may be thought provoking or even inspiring but my experiences from May 22, 2006 to May 27, 2006 will leave a tremendous impact on my life and hopefully reading this will do the same for you.

Some background on myself to gain some perspective. Reading from my bio you can see that I worked for the NHRA for over fours years in the media relations department. During that stint I met a wonderful woman in Southern California that despite my constant travels to racetracks all over the country was always there to pick me up at the airport and spent as much time as she could before I had to leave for another race. Throughout the courtship I became close with both her parents. Many people joke that they do not like their in-laws but this was not the case with my wife’s family. My wife’s father was a big fan of drag racing and possibly my job with the NHRA helped to endear me to him. He was downright giddy when I first met him and could hardly wait five minutes before he started asking me about my job with the NHRA, my travels, who I know and funny stories from the track. He said he was so glad he could talk about drag racing with someone that enjoyed it as much as he did. It’s funny how a love of drag racing can bring two people together like it did for us.

My father-in-law, Peter Berchiolli Sr., was big into hot rods. My wife, although not a big fan of racing, did learn the ins and outs of a garage by helping out her dad. My father-in-law loved cars and he was never happier than when he was in the garage working on his hot rods. He had completed restoring a 1941 Willys Street Rod that was complete with racing slicks and a blower. On a handshake and a promise, he gave the Willys to a friend he had met from car shows and in return he received a 1934 Ford. He then went to work on that car and would tinker with it in the evenings after work and for extended periods of time on the weekends. The man loved cars and he loved drag racing but most of all he loved his family.

My wife and I were married on May 14, 2005 and we found out she was pregnant in October. The baby’s due date was estimated to be June 15, 2006 and of course being brand new parents we were excited yet anxious and scared of being able to care for and provide for the baby when she arrived. This baby was going to be the first grandchild for my in-laws and it was hard to determine who was more excited for this baby’s arrival. Pete was always saying how he couldn’t wait to do the grandpa type things, like take her to Disneyland or to the beach or even her first car show. (I guess nothing draws a crowd better than a baby sitting next to a vintage street rod.)

Through regular doctor’s visits and a sonogram, we learned we were going to have a little girl. We chose the name Avery Marie and knowing her name just added to the anticipation. A few weeks ago during a regular check-up, my wife was diagnosed with Pregnancy-Induced Hypertension (PIH) also known as Preeclampsia. In a nutshell, my wife’s blood pressure was very high and if not contained could result in seizures, stroke and irreparable harm to the unborn baby. Unfortunately there is no cure for PIH other than birth. The doctor determined that my wife’s health and the health of the baby was in jeopardy and even though it was four weeks prior to her due date the doctor felt it better to have the baby early than to run the risk of seizures and stroke. On May 22, 2006 at 6:21 pm pacific time, our daughter, Avery Marie, was born via cesarean section. People always say the birth of a child can be the happiest day of ones life and this one did rank up there for me.

Because she was about four weeks early and combined with a C-section delivery, Avery was having a bit of trouble breathing. With a normal labor and delivery, babies get the opportunity to squeeze out most of the fluid they have had in their lungs during contractions. C-section babies don’t get that chance and go from being warm and content and not having to use their lungs to being pulled out abruptly and expected to kick start their lungs from the start. Sadly, Avery was in this situation and had quite a bit of fluid in her lungs at delivery. The pediatrician on site made the call after four hours in the nursery that she should be transferred to the NICU of Children’s Hospital of Orange County (CHOC).

Avery’s breathing was strained and extremely high and was a major concern. She was taking between 120 to 140 breaths per minute. Normal newborns take between 30 to 60 breaths in a minute. After 36 hours of using nasal canules and a CPAP, they decided to intubate her. They snaked a tube down her throat and hooked her up to a machine that basically did the breathing for her. The doctors explained that it was not that she was incapable of breathing on her own but in trying to breathe with all the fluid still in her lungs she was exhausting herself and was burning too much energy. They compared it to running a marathon for the last 36 hours while having the worst chest cold you have ever had and multiply that by ten. She just needed a break to rest and once her body was able to process and absorb the fluid in her lungs they took the tube out on May 25th.

The great news is that Avery is doing fantastic now. My wife was discharged from the hospital with a clean bill of health on May 26th and although she was a bit disappointed we would not be taking Avery home with us, we knew she was in very good hands. Avery does not need any additional oxygen to supplement her breathing and should be coming home soon. Because she was a little early and still should not be born just yet, we are now making sure she can eat properly so she can continue to gain weight and grow into a happy and healthy little girl. Apparently when you have been struggling for breaths for days and have been eating via an IV, your ability to coordinate swallowing and breathing might take some time. Once she is eating enough to satisfy the doctors she will be free to come home.

It has been an emotional roller coaster since last May 22nd with the anticipation of Avery’s arrival, the scare of her having to go to NICU and the joy of knowing she is getting better without any adverse effects. Adding to the emotions has been some very sad news as well. On Friday, May 26, my father-in-law suffered a heart attack while at work. He was transported to Anaheim Memorial Medical Center where he was put on life support after 45 minutes from initially collapsing. Just after midnight in the early morning hours of May 27th, Pete Sr. suffered another heart attack while in the hospital and doctors and nurses were unsuccessful in reviving him. Pete Sr. had turned 60 in February and had suffered a previous heart attack a few years prior that required bypass surgery. Needless to say we were all shocked and devastated by the news.

Of course he will be greatly missed and this has been especially difficult on my mother-in-law and my wife. I do take comfort that Pete Sr. was here long enough to see his first and only grandchild before he left us. He was able to see her briefly the night she was born and also had a chance to visit with her while at CHOC.

I am hopeful that Avery coming home from the hospital will help ease the pain of losing her grandpa for those of us that knew him and loved him. It’s strange how becoming a parent in the blink of an eye will make you more reflective and more appreciative of simpler things. I know this is out of character for me to be this serious but I suppose being scared to death you are going to lose your baby the night she is born will do that to you. I would think that losing your father-in-law a few days afterwards will have that same effect too.

Even more out of character for myself or for news websites is what I am going to ask you to close your browser after you complete reading this. Hopefully you will be inspired to mend fences with a friend or family member that you may have been angry with years ago but can’t remember why anymore. Send them an e-mail or better yet call them right now. Go hug your kids and make sure they know that you love them. Hug and kiss your spouse and tell them the same. You never know when will be your last chance to see them. Thank goodness I was able to give Pete Sr. a hug and tell him I loved him while my wife was still recovering in the hospital. The man loved cars, drag racing, his family and we are sure he loved his granddaughter. I am thankful he was able to meet her before he was taken from us too soon.

Rest in peace Pete Berchiolli Sr. We’ll raise a granddaughter you will be proud of.

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